[GAU] Computer Lab (Kelly/Konrad 2/3/2015

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[GAU] Computer Lab (Kelly/Konrad 2/3/2015

Postby DEM » Thu Feb 12, 2015 10:18 pm

<b>Konrad Kendel (Dead Elf Mage)</b>
(2/3/2015 6:24:43 PM) (2019693)

Students aren't allowed to install software onto school computers. It's a simple rule, and it makes a lot of sense: they don't want us coming into computer lab during lunch or study hall periods and playing games on their dime. If we can't install software, then they don't have to worry about what we're installing. Jason Donnelly, a senior, got caught two years ago installing software onto one of the computers by networking in from home after hours. He got expelled for hacking the school's system and tampering with grades. He didn't touch the grades, but they didn't care. It was an excuse to get rid of a student who was smarter than them.

That's why me and Kelly? We're playing WotOFR. On the school computers.

You can't install anything on the computers. WotOFR runs just fine off a flashdrive, and we've got 128gb SD-cards in our phones that let us store the entire game on them. Then just hook up the USB charging/data cables, and...

"Hey.." I lean left just a little, keeping my voice down so the substitute in charge of the lab doesn't hear, "Thanks again for getting me into your guild. I'll Get the B-raid up to speed this week, I swear."

<b>Kelly Benette (EvilSqueegee)</b>
(2/3/2015 6:46:59 PM) (2019712)

I really wish I had time for a Galactic Confrontation during class. It’s one thing to get quests done, maybe grind up mats for engineering or hunt down alien species to farm spell components from. But the real fun of WotOFR is the same as it is anywhere else on the internet -- showing the devs they suck at designing challenges, or showing other players they suck at designing challenges.

“You better,” I glance to him out of the corner of my eye. “You hold ‘em back and I’m gonna look like a dork.”

I can’t afford to show off bad judgement right before the Empress of our Legion takes a four-month cruise-ship vacation. It’s either going to be me or Holmgang, and Holmgang is an idiot who doesn’t know what he’s talking about, not to mention the people-management skills of a wet asshole.

Yeah. He’s kinda grody. I don’t want to be taking orders from him, especially not right when we’re on the cusp of finishing Phase 3 of Titan Astral Moon. Nobody’s seen the cutscene at the end of the Psychic Plane fight, and I want my name in the freaking credits when the next expansion hits. There’s also the part where the winners get to forge the story as the Universe moves on into it’s next cycle…

...and seriously? If the jerks rooting for the Undead Tide get their way, I’m never going to find out what’s going on with the Valkrie Princess and her prisoner-of-war. So.

“No pressure or anything. It’s only world firsts.”

I smile and look back at my screen. God, why does the solar exploration content need to be so damn <i>boring</i>?

“<i>Woh-woh, wun-woh-woh-woooah. MIss Bennette?</i>”

“He’s adding to his loop counter each iteration. Needs to use better variable names.”

<i>”Very good, Miss Bennette. Woh-woh wunwoah-woh…”</i>

Ugh. Drop rates can kiss my ass.

<b>Konrad Kendel (Dead Elf Mage)</b>
(2/3/2015 6:56:29 PM) (2019720)

"Hold them back?" Yes, that's sheer snobbery dripping off my voice there. "If your medics can do their job, KB, I'll have them ahead of you guys before the loot timer expires on your next General Molybdenum kill."

Pfft. Like I'd let her look like a dork. Like i'd let <i>me</i> look like a dork! Trust me, I've crunched the numbers and looked at their Confrontation strats, and I can see exactly where the math says 'do it this way instead'. If there's one thing I know, it's math, and math? Math <i>never</i> lies.

The substitute, on the other hand, wouldn't know math if it bit him in the fucking <i>ass</i>.

"They always need to use better variable names, KB. It's the curse of having no imagination. Ugh. Triple Tachyon Slime coming in from the left. I got 'em, you go ahead and get the salvage off that crashed hoversled."

Really, the number of crashed hoversleds in this part of the station would make me seriously question the competence of the Imperium's licensing department, if I didn't know they were <i>just</i> here to salvage Techcrafter mats.

<b>Kelly Benette (EvilSqueegee)</b>
(2/3/2015 7:12:01 PM) (2019737)

“Please. My medics can do everyone’s job, not just theirs.”

Then again, my medics are in the A-group… which is what I’m doing out here right now. Konrad thinks we’re farming Techcrafter mats to catch me up on my draconic Staff quest progression. And, while it’s true that I need to catch up, what I haven’t told him is that these mats are actually going into my storage Station until the patch that should be coming out this Thursday. They’re introducing a new cosmetic weapon everyone’s going to want to make… and the cosmetic weapon is going to be crafted from these mats.

The Black Market is just a goldmine waiting to happen right now. I actually pay attention to the dev’s Twitter accounts, more than once it’s payed off and I’ve predicted a change. This one was so obvious it hurts, but I’m like one of 200 people who actually follow that twitter handle… and I’m the only one on our Dimension, at least as far as I can tell.

With the credits I’m going to be <i>swimming in</i>, between me and the Empress’s market control? I’m going to boost Konrad from his ilvl9000 gearset to the breaking-point thresholds around 9500, where his damage-loop tanking won’t just be good, it’ll be downright begging for a nurf for the sake of the game. He’ll be counting for threat, mitigation <i>and</i> DPS, worth filling two raid slots rather than just one. And that’s gonna pull him from B-group to A-group. Already got the green light for it… but everyone agreed to keep it a secret from him.

Because I want to see the look on his face when I hand him one of the only three <i>Maeleficang’s Psychofeedback Eviscerators</i> in any of the Dimensions. In a world full of morons, it really helps to stick close with the people that aren’t retarded.

Besides. Holmgang wants one. That’s good enough for me to give it to someone else.

“Didn’t you learn anything freshmen year? They don’t care how obvious the answer is, just that you bothered to give one.”

Of course, while I’m sitting here blowing off the substitute's lesson on subroutine structures -- seriously, who teaches this stuff in high school? -- there’s a woman with a shield, spear, and a fancy hat staring in confusion at the writing on the board. She’s poking it.

And I’m the only one who can see that. It’s alright though, now. I’m not freaking out. I’m learning to ignore it, and since Lilly is with me on it… I’ll be okay.

I salvage the hover sled.

<b>Konrad Kendel (Dead Elf Mage)</b>
(2/3/2015 7:20:19 PM) (2019742)

"Nope," I answer cheerfully, "Wasn't a damned thing they could teach me that I didn't already know."

Three Tachyon Slimes are, of course, almost as much of a joke as this substitute is, which is why I'm barely paying any actual attention to what's going on either in the game or in the room. Splitting my lack of attention like that's actually helpful: it keeps me from having to be bored, and believe me, boredom is a fucking <i>killer</i> when it comes to my ability to function in these situations. There's just never enough going on.

"That's why they're making McBurgerQueen money teaching this crap to us after six years of college, and I'm making damned near the same amount making sure jocks like Michaela the track star gets a passing grade in basic tenth-grade algebra."

Kelly'll know who I mean. Everyone knows who Michaela is, even if maybe like a dozen people in the school (all of them faculty) give a shit.

<b>Kelly Benette (EvilSqueegee)</b>
(2/3/2015 7:28:37 PM) (2019748)

“I know, right? It’s sad when people like Luc- er, I mean, Mr. Rivale make more money going to brazil for a month than teachers make teaching us how to flip burgers for a living.”

Not that I actually know what it’s like to make money flipping burgers for a living. Not yet, anyways. Dad says I can’t try having a job on the weekends unless my next report card has nothing under a B+. There’s a McBurgerQueen right down the road from where I live. The manager there is cute, and I think he’d totally hire me. Cross your fingers, right?

“Michaela needs the money, though. More than Snape, anyways.” I gently nod up to the substitute.

“What about you? Pulling a Reed Richards, or planning on actually doing something with that fat head of yours?”

I stick out my tongue. A part of me hates him a little. He doesn’t have to put work into making grades look easy.

<b>Konrad Kendel (Dead Elf Mage)</b>
(2/3/2015 7:34:37 PM) (2019757)

"I was thinking I might singlehandedly solve all the world's problems and then charge them out the ass to actually get the solutions from me, one by one. But you know, I might just make myself the richest guy on the planet and keep all my friends on my payroll as 'social advisors'."

She gets a wink - after all, I've got what? Like... four friends, total?

"How about it? Wanna go pro on the world firsts?"

<b>Kelly Benette (EvilSqueegee)</b>
(2/3/2015 7:48:19 PM) (2019770)

“With any luck I’ll be raking in Twatch subscription money in the next two years.”

I’ve got a plan. Streaming ‘till partnership. Burgers until then.

“Gaming for a living? Race you there, pro-boy.”
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